Bullying in schools and society

Paolo Kernahan

IMAGINE waking up every morning oppressed with dread at the thought of facing your tormentors in school. For reasons you can’t understand, they make it their life’s mission (life so far, at any rate) to make yours a living hell.

That’s what it must have been like for Jayden Lalchan for several years. The high-schooler endured physical and psychological torture at the hands of his committed bullies until he felt there was no recourse beyond the tragic escape he chose.

His parents have lost their only child; a boy brimming with potential that will never be realised. There’s a space left in his bed – a space he filled in his parents’ lives that will remain a cavernous reminder of the pain he could no longer endure.

This pain is now bequeathed to his parents, which they must carry to their last days. It will be a lasting consequence of the bullying from which there seemed to be no salvation; none responsible, no one compelled to intervene – neither sanctuary nor succour for the victims, both parents and child.

As public outrage over the incident billowed out of control, righteous indignation quickly metamorphosed into large-scale bullying. Self-appointed wrath-of-God types online rained fire on the boys said to be responsible, their relatives and even anyone who pointed out the irony of their fighting bullying with bullying.

But then, that’s human nature. “Civilised society” is only one breath away from eruptive animus through which we gleefully tear each other to pieces.

So shocking were the circumstances precipitating Jayden’s death, they influenced discourse in that esteemed house of pointlessness – Parliament. Minister in the Ministry of Education Lisa Morris-Julian spoke passionately about the services and facilities available to parents and students. A team from the Ministry of Social Services was dispatched to visit the family. The Student Support Services Division contacted the family and is offering support to students at the school.

“Bullying and intimidation is a major offence listed by the Ministry of Education’s national discipline matrix and it carries severe consequences,” Morris-Julian thundered. It certainly does – for the Lalchan family, anyway. All the king’s horses and all the king’s men appear to have responded to this long-standing crisis like a fire station – after the house had already burned to the foundations.

Where was this flurry of activity and empathy when Jayden was in the unrelenting grip of his tormentors?

The boy’s mother catalogued a history of indifference from school administrators. For their part, the school’s board issued a statement including the peculiar “clarification” that there was only one report of an altercation, made last month. The statement said all protocols were followed.

“It is the school’s practice that parents are called in to work on solutions. The deans would compile a report for the principal and this would be passed on to the Ministry of Education.”

The calamitous outcome of this affair raises serious questions about exactly how much “practice” the school has had at this.

Lachlan’s mother said she never got a callback from the dean, despite all the consolatory backrubbing. By her account, she was subsequently passed on to the principal, who later claimed ignorance of the matter.

School bullying isn’t unique to this country, nor are stories that end like Jayden’s.

In other countries, however, the history of tragedy shapes policy to protect others. That’s not likely to happen here, if our history is anything to go by.

Schools are a microcosm of wider society. The intemperate, insulting and crass language we see at the highest levels of leadership is reflected in student populations. The violence that ambushes us everywhere, the propensity of Trinis to do as they please – play loud music at all hours, block other people’s driveways, lie, steal and cheat – all find expression among impressionable youth.

Often, parents of students bullying others simply don’t have the resources or maturity to counsel their children away from such destructive behaviours.

Mediation skills? In this country, knives are drawn for minor fender-benders. People cuss wind if you are caught resting at a traffic light an eye-blink after it’s turned green. We aren’t the genial society we pretend to be.

That’s why citizens should be able to rely on a vast network of taxpayer-funded state resources to intervene in situations where children are at risk.

Offering comment on this unspeakable tragedy, ACP Wayne Mystar said Lalchan’s death is being treated with urgency.

It’s an appalling indictment on all of society that his life wasn’t treated with the same urgency.

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